Bad Timing

I start a new job in two hours and I have to leave for my college in 45 minutes, but I can barely get myself out of bed as I feel the incoming onslaught of a panic attack. I woke up under the overwhelming realization of the situation between my father and I. The part that tries to forget and continues in denial is temporarily broken and despite everything, my stupid heart still misses him. I still feel the sting and anger from my almost sister abandoning me and for some reason i still hate... Bad Timing
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/bad-timing.51589/