Hello Fellow Users

I m not quite sure how I got here, I was just clicking some things on Google because I was looking for advise regarding psychosomatic pain and paralysis in those with Ptsd. So yes, that s mainly how I ve got here and I decided to join after reading different topics for a few hours because it seems like a good place to talk to some people who may understand my general ramblings. First things first, I m not diagnosed with Ptsd but F62.0 (I m from Europe), that s similar to the American DESNOS... Hello Fellow Users
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/hello-fellow-users.55390/

Ptsd Relationship Breakdown Advice

Hi everyone, I am new to the forum. My introduction thread is here https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/this-is-me-thanks-for-reading.55388/ What I really need help with is this: I met my partner in 2012, we were together for a year and then I struggled to balance my relationship with my studies (I was severely depressed too, but in a world of pretending). I broke it off and we had no contact for nearly... Ptsd Relationship Breakdown Advice
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/ptsd-relationship-breakdown-advice.55389/

127 Ranger Students Complete Mountain Phase, Move On To Swamp Phase

US Army Fort Benning Ranger School Update: DATE: July 31, 2015 MEDIA RELEASE: Ranger School update: 127 Ranger students complete Mountain Phase, move on to Swamp Phase FORT BENNING, Georgia – Today, the U.S. Army Maneuver Center of Excellence announced 125 men and two women met the standards to complete the Mountain Phase of the Ranger Course. These students will... 127 Ranger Students Complete Mountain Phase, Move On To Swamp Phase
https://www.mycombatptsd.com/threads/127-ranger-students-complete-mountain-phase-move-on-to-swamp-phase.4010/

Graduation: My Dream Deferred - Realized!

On May 31 I finished my last class in my bachelor s degree program. On July 19 my degree was officially conferred. I dropped out of high school at 17, only a few months from graduation, due to PTSD, undiagnosed and untreated at the time. It was all I could do to stay sane. But I stabilized a lot over the years, and two and a half years ago started therapy again. I was inspired to return to college, which had been a fantasy of mine when I was young. I had to complete 21 courses (I d... Graduation: My Dream Deferred - Realized!
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/graduation-my-dream-deferred-realized.55387/

This Is Me... Thanks For Reading

Hi everyone, I made the decision to sign up pretty quickly. I am struggling quite a bit with life at the moment with limited support, and I found myself googling for advice. That s where I found this forum, and spent ages reading posts and realised I could do with some specific advice. A bit of background... I m 24 and living in Perth, Australia. I was born in the UK and moved here 10 years ago with my family. Since my early teens, I have always had bouts of depression and anxiety. I... This Is Me... Thanks For Reading
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/this-is-me-thanks-for-reading.55388/

What The Cat Dragged In

Funny, I seem to have learned the best lessons from animals. There was Buddy, who showed me what it was like to live in fear and what triggers were. He was a stray and horrified of water hoses. I didn t understand it at the time (I was early 20 s) , but respected it. I later found out, when he other owners realized he lived with me that he lived by a school and kids used to throw things at him (he hated all kids except my own). When he reacted they used to hose him down. I realized at... What The Cat Dragged In
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/what-the-cat-dragged-in.55385/

I Set A Boundary

As supporters we need boundaries. My sufferer seems to just get worse. He will go days without talking to me but when he does it s just about sex. He claims he s always horny cuz of PTSD. Last night a girl went to his place, got him off then left. Then he called me to listen to my voice while he did his business. At 2 in the morning my time. Mind you were not together however, I need boundaries and respect. I told him straight up he needs help, that he s going to get an std or worse. He just... I Set A Boundary
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/i-set-a-boundary.55384/

Home Page Gb Load, Pay By The Gb - Gb Light Access?

GB download of Home? etc. for those of us that don t have unlimited data download. Skinny way to get to posts?
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/home-page-gb-load-pay-by-the-gb-gb-light-access.55383/

How Much Caffeine Do You Consume?

This is a poll for PTSD sufferers. I keep cutting all caffeine out of my diet, and then I give in again and again. Green tea is my biggest weakness, and I recently awaited the taste for coffee. I have switched to mostly decaf and it sometimes helps my anxiety. I have adhd (which overlaps significantly with hypervigilance of ptsd) and sometimes a little caffeine works like the adhd meds - so sometimes I give in again when I m really figity and anxious. However, too much and I can t sleep.... How Much Caffeine Do You Consume?
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/how-much-caffeine-do-you-consume.55382/

A Turn Away From Dissociation: The Association Thread

This is a silly game for all of us to connect whom usually disconnect. I will start with a word. The next person to post must post the first word that comes to mind (articles and prepositions do not count: the, a, an, of, etc.). The next person looks at the last post, posts their first word association, and so on. Please post your word at the end of your post so that this is the last word the next person reads and their association can be clear! The fun of the game is getting from... A Turn Away From Dissociation: The Association Thread
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/a-turn-away-from-dissociation-the-association-thread.17765/

Relationship Ended After She Started Prolonged Exposure Therapy

First off, I’d like to thank the people who have posted in the forums because anytime I feel really down I come on here to read and relate to many of you. I’ll try to be brief with my story: I was dating a woman from my hometown who developed PTSD while we were in a long-distance relationship. We dated for 6 months when she experienced a terrible sexual assault incident at her university. During the first year after the incident, we did our best to see each other often as we were 800 miles... Relationship Ended After She Started Prolonged Exposure Therapy
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/relationship-ended-after-she-started-prolonged-exposure-therapy.55380/

Getting Back To Strong

Lately I ve been pondering a lot why I end up feeling weak and mildly unhappy and just not......me, when I am in a committed relationship. Yes, it is true that the two long-term relationships I ve had, have both been with men who have PTSD. It is also true that my ex was a lying turd, and that my relationship with him should not have lasted 6 months, let alone spanned 15 years. But I suspect the answer lies within me, and my self image, my doubts, my expectations of myself - and... Getting Back To Strong
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/getting-back-to-strong.55381/

Wake Up Choking

Hi just wanted to see if anyone knew what was wrong. The letter below is what I found on the net which I could of wrote myself. For more than eight years, I ve always dreamed of some objects about to slip into my windpipe or had already slipped into my windpipe. I thought I was going to die, I would quickly jump out of bed (and knocked myself on something hard that I got bruises), attempting to clear my throat by making gagging sound, or putting my head down towards the floor so the...Click to expand... Wake Up Choking
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/wake-up-choking.23242/

Tolerant To Trazodone ?

Has anyone else noticed that they became tolerant to trazodone after taking taking it for a certain period of time? I switched to it earlier this year in order to wean myself off of ambien and it worked well... until the last few weeks. I still get drowsy from it and can fall asleep initially, but I m up shortly thereafter for the duration or at least tossing and turning very restlessly "sleeping" until I wake up again an hour or two later. Lately I ve been taking ambien when I wake up so... Tolerant To Trazodone ?
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/tolerant-to-trazodone.55379/

New Relationship And Trigger

Hi all, I very recently started dating someone that suffers from PTSD. He told me he did after he came home and found his father passed away in the kitchen floor. From the way he talked about his dad, I can tell he carries some guilt (I never saw my dad s swelling, one of the first warning signs of a heart attack, etc). We are long distance and recently spent a weekend together that could not have been any better or more amazing! He laid his heart out to me, we have discussed marriage and... New Relationship And Trigger
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/new-relationship-and-trigger.55378/

Yoga Of 12 Step Recovery

Don t know if this is right spot for this but I had gone to my aprn this afternoon and thought I d give it a try. 2 hours first part grounding and sharing from topics on cards that were 12 step program slogans and how the card you picked applied to you. Then re grounding and the rest of it was yoga poses. I m going to go back. Pretty relaxed after going.
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/yoga-of-12-step-recovery.55375/

Yoga Of 12 Step Recovery

Im running into some what of an issue i have discovered that one of my main triggers is part of my own body my arms are covered in scars some cigarette burn scars and some self inflicted scars i plan on getting tattoo s to cover and hopefully aid me in my recovery process but tattoos are expensive and i am unable to start them yet is there anyway that i can cover them or do something to help so that i dont trigger off them i ve tried wearing long sleeves but i tend to notice them more even... Issue With My Own Scars Being A Trigger
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/yoga-of-12-step-recovery.55377/

Issue With My Own Scars Being A Trigger

Im running into some what of an issue i have discovered that one of my main triggers is part of my own body my arms are covered in scars some cigarette burn scars and some self inflicted scars i plan on getting tattoo s to cover and hopefully aid me in my recovery process but tattoos are expensive and i am unable to start them yet is there anyway that i can cover them or do something to help so that i dont trigger off them i ve tried wearing long sleeves but i tend to notice them more even... Issue With My Own Scars Being A Trigger
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/issue-with-my-own-scars-being-a-trigger.55368/

I Will Never Forgive Him.

PTSD or not I will never forgive my ex. A month ago I was discarded because I found his and his ex name from a wedding registry website while google searching his name out of curiosity. and when I tried to contact his ex for answers he blew up and ripped me apart. Last April he broke up with me. A week after the break up I initiated no contact. I tried to take a break and explore Miami for 2 days (I experience caregiver burnout and need breaks). Meanwhile he kept emailing how much he missed... I Will Never Forgive Him.
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/i-will-never-forgive-him.55374/

How Does Someone Make You Feel Alone?

Is that them or you?
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/how-does-someone-make-you-feel-alone.55373/

A Great Big Thank-you.

I would simply like to say a great big thankyou for the contents of the box that arrived for me the other day. The sender knows who they are and I am so grateful I feel it only appropriate to place this thread on the forum as a way of showing my appreciation for this kindness. Receiving the contents of this box could not have happened at a better moment, thank-you again. Laurie
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/a-great-big-thank-you.55372/

Yesterday, My Therapist Dumped Me.

I had been to see her for three weekly visits. We were just getting started. The problem happened during our last session. She raised her voice at me, talking down to me and pointing into a notebook; page by page, to make an example, and she was angry at me. I gently mentioned to her that it was triggering my PTSD, and frightening me; reminding me of the way my abusers have treated me. It was inappropriate behavior, but again, I did not respond in anger. I seek peace and comfort, and I want... Yesterday, My Therapist Dumped Me.
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/yesterday-my-therapist-dumped-me.55370/

Awesome Link Page

I go to this website every day, as each day there is another link to images of deep space, like our galaxy in the sky, or a planet or a moon or just really intriguing astronomy images. I have been visiting this page every day since the day I first heard of it. http://apod.nasa.gov/apod/archivepix.html
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/awesome-link-page.55367/

My Experience As A Supporter

Hello everyone. I thought I would share my experience as a supporter. I ve read the stories of others and found it helpful so I hope my story is helpful for someone else. I m not even sure where to begin really. My wife was diagnosed with PTSD in early May, caused by trauma she experienced through her childhood, adolescent and early adult years. Her father was a dry alcoholic with a short fuse who grew up in an abusive environment himself. He was controlling and mentally/emotionally... My Experience As A Supporter
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/my-experience-as-a-supporter.55369/

Warning May Trigger

Im running into some what of an issue i have discovered that one of my main triggers is part of my own body my arms are covered in scars some cigarette burn scars and some self inflicted scars i plan on getting tattoo s to cover and hopefully aid me in my recovery process but tattoos are expensive and i am unable to start them yet is there anyway that i can cover them or do something to help so that i dont trigger off them i ve tried wearing long sleeves but i tend to notice them more even... Warning May Trigger
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/warning-may-trigger.55368/

Anxiety In Between Contact

Hello all, It s been quite a while since I ve posted here but I could use some calm and understanding perspective. (Please try and be moderate in your replies, keeping in mind it s a long story and this is just some of it and I really hope you all can help me calm down, not ramp up more, ha.) Long story short, I ve been in therapy 2.5 years, but... in a sense I ve gotten a lot more work done than the typical course of therapy perhaps because for the first couple years, we probably met... Anxiety In Between Contact
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/anxiety-in-between-contact.55366/

My Wife Has Ptsd From An Abusive Stepfather, How To Help?

Long story but I need to share. Also a throwaway for obvious reasons. November of last year I get a job. Its a good job. high pay, great benefits, strong career path etc. However, my boss is insane. Asking too much of me, making me work long hours, and not really understanding what an accountant is supposed to do (she wasn t college educated) and constantly beating me up over things that were not my fault. long story short, I lost the job. I spent the next few months blaming myself,... My Wife Has Ptsd From An Abusive Stepfather, How To Help?
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/my-wife-has-ptsd-from-an-abusive-stepfather-how-to-help.55365/

Cathartic Panic Attack??

Hi, I m new to the site. I ve had many panicked panick attacks. But last night, working on a particularly traumatic memory during self administered emdr, I had a positive break through about the events. Or shall we say bittersweet. But it was positive in as much as it got me one step closer to the truth I ve been hidding from emotionally. But it was overwhelming... I started gasping for air, deep breaths, my heart racing...I was having a panic attack. But this one, rather than seeming... Cathartic Panic Attack??
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/cathartic-panic-attack.55364/

Posting For Sheliakathy

In this thread https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/i-dont-want-to-be-functional-anymore.55361/#post-885384 She wrote "I cannot get into anything on the WHOLE FORUM. I have been locked out with some kind of strange images that are not links. This thread is the only one that I can reply to. Please, someone help me to be able to access the whole Forum again. Can someone let Anthony know this has happened to me?" I am just the messenger. Nvm she got in.
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/posting-for-sheliakathy.55362/

Another Sleep Medication Post

Lately Ambien triggers drinking episodes which are really bad for me. But somehow I can take Flexeril plus Benadryl and still lay half awake with weird racing thoughts for most of the night (I think I slept 2 hours last night). I don t want to take anything SSRI or a med I need to take every night, but the sedative-hypnotics are not good for me. Neither are benzos. I already sent a message to my doctor so I ll see what she says. But I m curious what has worked for others in the as-needed... Another Sleep Medication Post
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/another-sleep-medication-post.55363/

Internet Protocol (IP) Shortage - Google To Blame

Let me get to the crux of the issue first and foremost IP s used to cost $1 per month. […]
https://ptsdblog.com/ptsd/internet-protocol-ip-shortage-google-to-blame/81/

Success With Feelings Of Apprehension And Straight Up Fear

So it has been a while since I have posted. In this time a lot has occurred, like we all don t feel this. For the most part I have been in a good state, almost normal, but with a few triggers...multiple trailer park thugs with pit bulls on chains, other roughians and above all dealing with bureaucrats. This last group is the worst as they tend to sit on their asses and either create a sound and complete stop to progress or do not do anything at all. I have been working so hard to, no I... Success With Feelings Of Apprehension And Straight Up Fear
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/success-with-feelings-of-apprehension-and-straight-up-fear.54887/

Could This Be A Form Of Hypervigilence?

I was sitting here reading some of the threads and this thought came to me. I am overly sensitive to certain kinds of humor. When I see someone being laughed at, or people posting videos of others doing something perceived as stupid; I find myself thinking that it is a mean-spirited thing that is being done. I don t like humor that targets others that is potentially humiliating or otherwise degrading to the person. I know these feeling are because of my past abuse, and I am wondering if... Could This Be A Form Of Hypervigilence?
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/could-this-be-a-form-of-hypervigilence.55359/

I Don't Know How To Help.

I m just at a loss at what to do, where to turn, or how to help my sufferer. He s been not functioning well for a while. We moved to get him to a better area, to get him to somewhere where he would be triggered less and hopefully have more help. Really wanted to move to a medical marijuana state (please don t judge), but at the time my sufferer wasn t able to move as far as we would have had to have moved. So instead we moved a few hours away where I was able to get a better job and have the... I Don t Know How To Help.
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/i-dont-know-how-to-help.55360/

I Don't Want To Be Functional Anymore

Throughout my time with PTSD, I have always managed to lead a sort of double life -- i ve always functioned so that no one knew anything was wrong. I ve always had a job, i ve always been more or less responsible. But now I am walking a very thin line, and I think I want to fall apart. I don t think I want to function. I am destroying myself. I drink almost every day, have started doing recreational drugs, yet I still have a job. But I am so tempted to just hit rock bottom and quit and... I Don t Want To Be Functional Anymore
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/i-dont-want-to-be-functional-anymore.55361/

Good Morning!

Just saying good morning. Wanted to say good morning to all the kind people who have been so supportive. Hope everyone has a nice day!
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/good-morning.55358/

Sleep Help - Herbs Or Supplements

I have issues falling asleep and staying asleep at night. (right now no issues sleeping during day...sadly. I can control my mind better to relax. But sleeping during day is new to me past few months since put on Zoloft.) I m getting off Zoloft and Klonopin. I m looking for natural sleep aids and melatonin doesn t help me. I picked-up a bottle of Benadryl for temporary relief. But I m really looking for herbs or supplements to help. Benadryl gives me side-effects.
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/sleep-help-herbs-or-supplements.53400/

Totally Worn Out

I m exhausted. The roller coaster never seems to stop and, for the first time, I m questioning if we have a future and whether staying put is sustainable. I don t know how long I can keep doing this, and it s breaking my heart : ( Boyfriend and I have been living together for a little over two years, together for 2.5 years, and best friends for nearly 10 years. He is a domestic violence survivor, and only recently told me that the abuse he experienced was so extreme that he actually... Totally Worn Out
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/totally-worn-out.48993/

Escape Route Ideas?

I don t know where to post this. I have a new neighbor. I live too close to these people. She woke me up this morning. Finally I leaped out of bed feeling terrified and now I want to leave but am listening to music. I am isolated and alone. No one is here. Loss, torture chamber of a mind, attacking me with my "mistakes", cruelty in abundance, can t rest. Not coping. Think about suicide a lot. Need someone but no one is here to help me. At all. Feel like screaming.
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/escape-route-ideas.55357/

Not Sure

I don t know where to post this. I have a new neighbor. I live too close to these people. She woke me up this morning. Finally I leaped out of bed feeling terrified and now I want to leave but am listening to music. I am isolated and alone. No one is here. Loss, torture chamber of a mind, attacking me with my "mistakes", cruelty in abundance, can t rest. Not coping. Think about suicide a lot. Need someone but no one is here to help me. At all. Feel like screaming.
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/not-sure.54220/

But What If I'm Wrong?

What if I m just triggering and wrong? What if I just don t know anymore about relationships? What if he really is trying and I miss out because I triggered and flew off? How do people see through this?
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/but-what-if-im-wrong.55355/

I Hate Hearing Children Scream....

I really can t stand it......it almost makes me want to cry. anyone else experience this?
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/i-hate-hearing-children-scream.47859/

Finding Love After Abuse

I was in an abusive relationship way back when I was in college. After that I dated some but never anything serious. I could never get close to anyone. Well recently I meet a new guy and he is very nice, seems very laid back and calm, stable job, attractive. In short he is a "catch". I am taking things very, very slow and he is matching my pace. My issue is that even though I should be excited I am somehow not. I mean if I were to put down on paper what I wanted in a guy it is him but I... Finding Love After Abuse
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/finding-love-after-abuse.55348/

My Cowerker Triggered Me So Badly

Two of my coworkers, T (who s a good friend of mine and knows about some of the trauma I ve gone through) and K (who s new to the store and has given me a bad vibe since day one) were having a debate about animal testing in the break room before we all clock in. T thinks that having people on death row get tested is better than animals getting tested. K said that child molesters shouldn t because most girls cry wolf. T went off on him and I immediately shut down so I don t have a panic... My Cowerker Triggered Me So Badly
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/my-cowerker-triggered-me-so-badly.55349/

Escape Route Ideas?

Does anyone have any? I ve been looking all over with no luck. I have hardly any money and no friends or family. I m stuck living with a verbally abusive boyfriend that doesn t love me. I m thinking CREATIVE. I ve already tried a bunch of new angles. Trained to teach at a dojang, bartended, sold all willy nilly for a phone company, taught belly dance, surveys, can t find a gig to teach overseas, military won t take me, and now I m at a coffee shop. It s working so far, but I want out of... Escape Route Ideas?
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/escape-route-ideas.55347/

He Said We Needed Space, I Don't Even Know If We're Speaking

Its a very difficult question and something i ve struggled for a long time with. My relationship with my parents is palatable. We get along well, and they are great grandparents to my two kids. I have only one sibling, a younger sister, and our relationship is very strained and causes me lots of stress. Here s the quick and dirty background. I was diagnosed with PTSD at some point during my last five years of therapy. Interestingly, with a complaint of "stuckness", where every area of my... When Is It Right To Cut Off Relations With Family Member??
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/he-said-we-needed-space-i-dont-even-know-if-were-speaking.55345/

integrating self via ecc. 4:9—12

Jesus is my cord of strength Realization of shattered beginnings; yet hope survived. Multiple existences created evasiveness Yet we re ne er […]
https://ptsdblog.com/reconstructing/integrating-self-via-ecc-49-12/2403/

Can You Ever Get Rid Of A Trigger?

The other day I was stood in a queue at a busy airport when I learnt the hard way one of my biggest triggers. A group of girls were behind me who had his accent and were talking about where they lived which just so happened to be very close to where he lived. I felt so out of control and instantly developed complete hatred towards these girls. I convinced myself they were in on it and knew him. When I finally got out of the queue I needed to get away from them as fast as... Can You Ever Get Rid Of A Trigger?
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/can-you-ever-get-rid-of-a-trigger.55344/

He Said We Needed Space, I Don't Even Know If We're Speaking

I was with my Sgt for 16 months, and when he knew he was being retired, he decided he was moving home 5 miles away. He and I were awesome together. I knew he had PTSD from date 1, and it didn t deter me; I honestly love him with all my heart. In December, he even asked my mom permission to marry me. I was over the moon. He had his moments, and he would withdraw. I saw him off to his home state; it broke my heart knowing that I couldn t be there with him (yet) - he wanted to stabilize... He Said We Needed Space, I Don t Even Know If We re Speaking
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/he-said-we-needed-space-i-dont-even-know-if-were-speaking.55341/

Finding Out How Thoroughly I've Been Conditioned To React To Narcissists

Mods, please feel free to move if you feel this is in the wrong place. I found out a couple of weeks ago that one of the directors at my new job, is narcissistic. As far as narcs go, I ve been exposed to far more toxic, and far more psychopathic examples in the past, and in situations where I had far fewer resources and skills, but I m still reacting to this one far more than I think his real actions justify I find myself having intrusive thoughts of him being critical or questioning of... Finding Out How Thoroughly I ve Been Conditioned To React To Narcissists
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/finding-out-how-thoroughly-ive-been-conditioned-to-react-to-narcissists.53119/

I Think We Broke Up / Needed Space

I was with my Sgt for 16 months, and when he knew he was being retired, he decided he was moving home 5 miles away. He and I were awesome together. I knew he had PTSD from date 1, and it didn t deter me; I honestly love him with all my heart. In December, he even asked my mom permission to marry me. I was over the moon. He had his moments, and he would withdraw. I saw him off to his home state; it broke my heart... I Think We Broke Up / Needed Space
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/i-think-we-broke-up-needed-space.55342/