My Grandmother Is In Town And I Want To Ask Her Details Of My Abuse ....

.... But I m not sure it would be helpful. I don t remember most of what happened to me. I know I was young - I know it happened several times because my haircut changes in the memories. I know it happened - my grandfather, the shower, me and my sister .... I know he abused us sexually. Over and over. I can t remember how he got us alone and I don t know why or how it eventually ended. My sister could have corroborated my story, but she died half a lifetime ago. I shouldn t ask But I... My Grandmother Is In Town And I Want To Ask Her Details Of My Abuse ....
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/my-grandmother-is-in-town-and-i-want-to-ask-her-details-of-my-abuse.55471/

Fun Things To Do With Your Partner?

What is your favorite thing to do on a date as a PTSD sufferer or supporter? I m slowly venturing into dating again, not yet sure if I am ready or not. I don t like nosiey hectic clubs or big events with lots of people. Too much to deal with in addition to the stress of a first or second date. Movies are a hard way to get to know someone. Sitting and staring at each other over coffee is just plain awkward. So I have been trying out going to a museum together. It gives us something to... Fun Things To Do With Your Partner?
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/fun-things-to-do-with-your-partner.55469/

Crying A Lot....

I ve been crying a lot the past month. Like a lot. Over everything and anything. Slightly sad or sentimental tv commercial = I m in tears. Slightly sad comment on Facebook = I m in tears. Happy scene in a silly you tube video = I m in tears. Making breakfast = I m fighting back tears. I feel confused about this. I have been depressed before, but never so teary at the drop of a hat. I usually struggle with suicidal thoughts when feeling depressed and hopeless. I m not having those... Crying A Lot....
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/crying-a-lot.55467/

Lost Love...

My lover came over and told me today that we can t have sex or be intimate anymore because his wife is no longer ok with it. I m heart broken. I don t know how to handle it. He meant so much to me and now he is crying to me begging to let him still be in my life as friends and I just don t know if my heart can handle it... I want to slit my wrists.. And walk out in front of traffic.. But he told me if I did my son would go to my abuser, which is true... So I m just dying inside... I feel... Lost Love...
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/lost-love.55468/

What Would You Warn Others Or Yourself To Do Regarding Living With Ptsd, Knowing What You Now Know?

Just curious, what would be some important advice you would give to someone with PTSD or yourself right now. Knowing what you know how PTSD affects your life. I would say get every possible insurance; high car accident insurance; at least 100,000 if in car accident, have a plan b for a low cost living location; off the grid cabin or boat or apt. If you are losing contact with reality; it s PTSD; stop wasting your time on other theories. Avoid psychiatrists; wanna be doctors, ask regular... What Would You Warn Others Or Yourself To Do Regarding Living With Ptsd, Knowing What You Now Know?
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/what-would-you-warn-others-or-yourself-to-do-regarding-living-with-ptsd-knowing-what-you-now-know.55465/

Panic While Driving

Hi there. Has anyone had success overcoming panic attacks/anxiety while driving? I can drive anywhere as long as it is a regular city street or a highway with an occasional stop light. Certainly NO bridges of any kind. I have made significant progress overcoming other triggers, but driving on a freeway is absolutely terrifying. It s an issue of having to drive really fast and fearing losing control of the vehicle or myself. This all became a problem about 4 years ago and my therapist and I... Panic While Driving
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/panic-while-driving.55464/

Trauma Experiences Change The Brain Even In Those Without Ptsd

Trauma may cause distinct and long-lasting effects even in people who do not develop PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder), according to research. It is already known that stress affects brain function and may lead to PTSD, but until now the underlying brain networks have proven elusive. Continue reading...
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/trauma-experiences-change-the-brain-even-in-those-without-ptsd.55457/

What Did You Miss Out On Growing Up?

Last year my psychologist told me to take a break from therapy because I had remembered being sexually abused in childhood. She told me to go away and feel all the emotions about the abuse, like anger and sadness. But she said I had missed out on all sorts of things growing up. I don t really know what she meant by this, other than being isolated by my abuser and therefore not having many friends. I don t know what other things I missed out on so I wondered what things did you all miss out... What Did You Miss Out On Growing Up?
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/what-did-you-miss-out-on-growing-up.54467/

Former Er Nurse

I spent 20 years in the medical field as a Navy Corpsman, EMT and an Emergency Room Nurse. I was just a normal burnt out Nurse up until 2011 when I lost my home and dog to a house fire. The fire happened while I was at work. The fire department responded and told my neighbors that I wasn t in their fire district and watched my house burn to the ground. People on the other side of the road were in a fire district but my house wasn t (No one informed me or any of my neighbors). I managed... Former Er Nurse
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/former-er-nurse.55463/

"the Look Of Silence"

Does acknowledgement of harm by perpetrators help healing? Important documentary film, part of the interview is below: (democracy now!.org Mon 8/3) … And then, of course, there’s this other layer of meaning, because it follows one survivor of the killings, Adi Rukun, the main character in the film, as he goes and visits the men who killed his brother, still in power, and tries to get them to take responsibility for what they’ve done, while testing their eyes. And so emerges—he’s an... "the Look Of Silence"
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/the-look-of-silence.55460/

My Friend Made A Disclosure Of Sa To Me. I Promised To Stay Quiet. What Should I Do?

Tonight my friend told me that the person who hurt me also hurt them, and told me how. They only told me because I promised them I wouldn t say anything and that they trust me implicitly. They were in pieces. I am in pieces, I feel so angry and so guilty. I don t know what to do. I know they wouldn t be able to emotionally manage if I forced them to say anything or if I told anybody, but I m not sure I can hold this. I wasn t believed about this person hurting me, but now I ve found out... My Friend Made A Disclosure Of Sa To Me. I Promised To Stay Quiet. What Should I Do?
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/my-friend-made-a-disclosure-of-sa-to-me-i-promised-to-stay-quiet-what-should-i-do.55461/

Sudden Muscle Spasms

So I ve never had my body react to the flashbacks this way before. It all started a week ago when I got triggered all of a sudden and the muscles from my shoulders to my lower back/abdomen area started twitching. It s like how you feel when you get really cold but aren t shivering just yet..I don t know how to explain it; it doesn t hurt but just makes me really uncomfortable. Ever since that happened, I ve been getting these muscle spasms each time I get triggered. I ve been in this... Sudden Muscle Spasms
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/sudden-muscle-spasms.55462/

Top 10 Things Not To Say To Someone With Ptsd

Here is a starter list...do you guys and gals have any other additions...serious or funny, both would be excellent. View attachment 713
https://www.mycombatptsd.com/threads/top-10-things-not-to-say-to-someone-with-ptsd.2047/

Not Sure What To Think

I have been reflecting on my past which has been filled with trauma after trauma. I got triggered big time by a friend. I know he did not mean to but some of the things he said did trigger me. We have been friends for over 20 years so he has seen my highs and my lows and he has been there for me when i felt no one else would be. We did get involved romantically and realized we were better friends then being intimate. Well the other day he started to comment about our time together... Not Sure What To Think
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/not-sure-what-to-think.55459/

Married To A Narcissist

I admit I m nervous and a bit scared to post this. I have PTSD from verbally and emotionally abusive relationships. I m in trauma therapy and discovered they were all overt narcissists. I ve also recently realized I m married to a covert narcissist. He s much more subtle than the others were but more damaging in a way. He s very controlling and manipulative but he doesn t realize it. He wants to know where I m at all the time and who I m with. He tracks what time I use the ATM and berates... Married To A Narcissist
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/married-to-a-narcissist.55458/

New Looking For Support

I have been reading posts from this site for a while and have found it so helpful. I have PTSD from sexual abuse when I was a child by my grandfather. I have a lot of vivid memories and a lot of things I don t remember about my childhood. I also was in two physically and sexually abusive relationships in my late teens and early twenties. Things were going well for 20 years or so and then a close friend of mine died from breast cancer and I started having nightmares and flashbacks again. My... New Looking For Support
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/new-looking-for-support.55455/

Ptsd From Abuse

I ve been reading this site for little awhile and finally found the courage to post. I have PTSD from verbally and emotionally abusive relationships and am in EMDR therapy. The therapy is helping a lot. I am hoping this forum will help as well.
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/ptsd-from-abuse.55451/

Near Constant Somatic Sensations

Hi All - Now that I am less dissociative I am aware of a near constant thrumming/tingling in my arms and feet. Sometimes, throat. The sensations are accompanied by small but insistent waves of fatigue. In discussing it with my T, I think it is the hyper/hypo arousal cycle that has probably been present since the earliest trauma (incest/sexual abuse from age 2 or 3). Awareness of this has been going on for months now. I would like to know if this sounds familiar to anyone else. The... Near Constant Somatic Sensations
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/near-constant-somatic-sensations.55452/

Near Constant Somatic Sensations

Does anyone else get lost due to dissociating? Up until recently I always thought of it as an adventure. I never knew where I d end up. Now it s another story. It has been becoming worse as I dissociate for longer periods of time. Recently I was assaulted while on public transportation. I have no memory of it because I was zoned out. However someone recorded it, and turned it into police. I have a wonderful therapist who I am working with, but we have yet to come up with a strategy of some... Getting Lost
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/near-constant-somatic-sensations.55454/

Getting Lost

Does anyone else get lost due to dissociating? Up until recently I always thought of it as an adventure. I never knew where I d end up. Now it s another story. It has been becoming worse as I dissociate for longer periods of time. Recently I was assaulted while on public transportation. I have no memory of it because I was zoned out. However someone recorded it, and turned it into police. I have a wonderful therapist who I am working with, but we have yet to come up with a strategy of some... Getting Lost
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/getting-lost.55453/

So Lost!

Hello, I m new here. found this site by accident really and thought maybe I could get some good advice from others who know what I m going through. As if having ptsd wasn t bad enough. When I came back I lost my brother in a car accident, my dad who also suffers from ptsd vanished ( which recently he was found but was gone for years). I feel like I am on a emotional rollercoaster. I have a beautiful wife and two kids. My wife has suffered because of me. I shut her out, hurt her feelings,... So Lost!
https://www.mycombatptsd.com/threads/so-lost.4014/

Ruined A Good Thing

Finally met a great guy who treated me really well and could ve offered me everything I want. And there was potential for a real relationship with a future. But I ruined it. Got very very drunk and was downright nasty to him, even hit him. I am so deeply ashamed and I hate myself for this. I don t think I will ever be able to forgive myself. Clearly I know I have to quit drinking. But now I ve lost someone I was quickly falling in love with. Worse yet, I ve hurt him.
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/ruined-a-good-thing.55450/

Soylent

Hey So last week I discovered the concept of Soylent. An all in one nutrional meal, which is supposed to be cheap and affordable, and that you could basically live exclusively on. It is designed to give you everything you need, like the slime from the matrix. But not disgusting. There are many brands of it, but Soylent was the first, so thats the name of the idea now. That they named it after the famous movie was supposed to be a joke I guess. They guarentee its not made of people.... Soylent
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/soylent.54458/

Do You Tend To Overspend?

I have had several overspending sprees throughout my life. I will try to be frugal and for awhile I can manage this. Then sometimes I get these wild urges to buy things. Sometimes I cannot prevent myself from buying them. Then my budget is all messed up and I end up not being able to buy something essential. Does this ever happen to you?
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/do-you-tend-to-overspend.55449/

Prednisone

No, its not a medication used to treat PTSD but being on it for other conditions can seriously increase PTSD symptoms. I just want to give people the heads up. If your Dr. recommends it for any health issues, ask about alternatives first. I thought the increase in anxiety and nightmares would ease up once I was off of it. I am 3 days into withdrawal now and I have been barley able to function. I was warned that being on it would increase my PTSD symptoms, but no one warned me about the... Prednisone
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/prednisone.55447/

New Body-mind Approach

My T is concentrating on the concussions I ve had. There have been six that are documented or happened when I was a young adult. Yesterday we tackled the one that is documented but I couldn t remember until last week. It involved tumbling during PE in second grade. My teacher demanded I try a vault jump, without a spotter of course - it was the 70s, and my arm gave way, I tumbled to the cement floor and was knocked out. The school did not inform my parents and they didn t believe it was... New Body-mind Approach
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/new-body-mind-approach.55448/

Parent Responses To Teen Suicide Attempt?

Hi everyone, I attempted suicide when I was a teenager. The hospital required me to see a child psychologist in an outpatient appointment. My Mum drove me to the appointment, and in the carpark told me not to say anything about what happens at home, or the fact that I used to cut myself, on the basis that the psychologist will only want to blow things out of proportion and will be out to ruin my father s career; and that we will be put into care i.e. the whole family would be destroyed.... Parent Responses To Teen Suicide Attempt?
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/parent-responses-to-teen-suicide-attempt.55446/

Tired Of It Always Being My Fault

I don t know what to do anymore, everything makes him angry. Today it s me. He s finally in therapy and I thought we were at least doing a little better, but I guess not. I was on the phone with my best friend too long and bothered him. He s back into his world of video games ignoring me. It s so hard, I feel like I have no one to turn to. I m supposed to be planning our wedding and whenever stuff like this happens I get scared. I know he ll come and apologize and say he loves me, but this... Tired Of It Always Being My Fault
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/tired-of-it-always-being-my-fault.55445/

Happy Birthday To My Eldest Son

My eldest son (M) turns twenty years old today. I would simply like to wish him a great birthday as he turns from a teenager into a fully grown man in his own right. I know that there has been a lot of pain and hurt between myself and him these last 2 years since my breakdown (for which I take full responsibility) and make no escuses for my behaviour back then. I hold onto the hope that one day we can reconsile with each other as he is my first born and will always hold a special spot in... Happy Birthday To My Eldest Son
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/happy-birthday-to-my-eldest-son.55443/

Talking With New Therapist Triggered Me Today.

I had to explain my trauma to the third therapist in less than a year, and it triggered my anxiety through my Klonopin dose. I feel really uncomfortable tonight, scared, and I have been crying a lot.
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/talking-with-new-therapist-triggered-me-today.55442/