Fam/trigger

i was out for lunch with family in my neighbourhood today when one of my fam members pointed out that my childhood abuser just passed by. my heart started racing and i almost wanted to cry. i said "why would you tell me that?" etc etc. i didn t do what i was supposed to do today. this means he s in my neighbourhood and has probably seen me multiple times without me knowing??? what the f*ck?????????? i feel low now.
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/fam-trigger.63127/