Thoughts On Possible Emotophobia (fear Of Strong Negative Emotions)

I nearly killed myself last Saturday. I felt really alone and no one wanted to talk to me except my abusive ex (and at least their manipulation is attention). I struggle to maintain a self-concept. I struggle to break through this giant plexiglass shield that has always surrounded me. I m always hungry. I don t really know if anything I do is real. I m not really aware of myself at any given point. I understand I should be practicing mindfulness but I can t do that without hating myself. It... If The Key To Happiness Is Loving Myself Then I Don t Know That I ll Ever Be Happy
https://www.myptsd.com/c/threads/thoughts-on-possible-emotophobia-fear-of-strong-negative-emotions.66719/